good advice, mind + body

Helping Those Who Don’t Want It


I am pursuing the career of being a psychologist. I’m going into the business of helping people. I want to help people who have a mental illness, have experienced trauma, need guidance, or just want to talk.  But I’m starting to realize that as much as I want to help people, they have to want to be helped.

The most exhausting thing is trying to help someone who doesn’t want help. Especially when it’s a loved one. You think you know what’s best for them and how they can improve their well-being. But they don’t want anything to do with that. They rather hide behind excuses or rather place the blame elsewhere. Even when their life is literally falling apart in front of their eyes, they still chose to ignore it.

You can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change. It’s so hard to let go and realize that this is their own battle. This is a battle that they first have to acknowledge before all else. They have to want to change. They have to reach out for the help once they accept that they need it. Until then, there’s no use in wasting the energy to help them.

Until that moment, there’s nothing you can do but be there for them. Let it be known that you’re there when try need you. And just hope soon they will come around soon.

I want to hear your thoughts!

Feel free to comment below.

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mind + body

Mindful Monday: Being Present

Happy Monday!

Today I am focusing my energy on being present. I’ve been trying to become more aware of my thoughts to keep myself from ruminating about things I have no control over. Most of those thoughts are of the past and the future. Being present allows me to think of the here and now. It allows one to focus all of one’s energy at the tasks at hand. Usually when I am being present, I feel more positive and aware of the world around me.

“Don’t look back, you’re not going that way.”
It’s okay to reminisce about the past. Those reflections can reveal one’s growth and the changes that have occurred. However, it’s not healthy for one to think/ obsess about the things that one could have done differently or events in their life that were unpleasant. Those negative thoughts usually change a person into having a foul mood.

“What can you do today to make a better tomorrow?”
The same thing can occur when only thinking about the future. Obviously, the future should be considered. But only paying attention to the future can cause a person to forget about the present. Being present is a great tool that directs your future to being what you have envisioned it.

I’ve been researching about meditation and it’s benefits. From what I know, when meditating, it’s not about controlling one’s thoughts but instead being aware of them. I’m sure meditation will help me on my goal of staying present. I will continue to learn more and try it out for myself.

I would love to hear some of the ways you keep a present mind! 🙂


mind + body

Monday Motivation: Stop Stealing Your Own Joy

The above quote is so true! How many times have you compared your life to someone else, only to be left with the feeling of jealousy or feeling blue? I know I personally have to remind myself from time to time to STOP.

Stop comparing yourself to others! Every one of us on this Earth are unique and have a different story. Thus creating our differences. So what, they have nicer clothes, better jobs, fancier cars, fitter bodies, funner lives, etc? If that’s how you feel, then bottle that emotion and be motivated to get that for yourself to. Try to imagine the competition is not with others, it’s with yourself. Because it truly is. Only YOU can make YOU better.

However, keep in mind that you’re not seeing another person’s entire life through social media. Social media can create illusions that others are living so much better than you. Remember, you are only seeing what others are choosing to post. And chances are, they are only posting the good. Everyone is fighting their own battle, whether you are aware of it or not. So if you are envious of someone because it seems they have the perfect life, just keep in mind they probably don’t. 

Even if they do have the “perfect” life, good for them! Don’t discredit yourself because of other’s accomplishments. It’s not fair to you and not fair to your own journey. Think of the struggles and hardships you may have overcome. Some self-reflection could make you appreciate what you have already achieved and all that you look forward to pursuing. Stop stealing your own joy by comparing yourself to others, and go out there and get your own “perfect” life!